


To Have and Hold

by CherubimPrince



Category: Castlevania (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:47:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23882518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CherubimPrince/pseuds/CherubimPrince
Summary: It didn't take long for Adrian to finally open up to you, and caring for each other comes just as quickly, just as easily.
Relationships: Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Reader
Kudos: 31





	To Have and Hold

**Author's Note:**

> I plan to make a sequel to this at some point. I have a few more ideas for this pair that just didn't get included.

Sunlight rays slipped in through narrow windows, a breeze blowing your bedroom curtains. The birds warbled just outside, you could see a peek of white smeared across endless day blue through the open window. Had Adrien come in and opened the windows? Perhaps he meant to check if you were awake, and opened them so you’d experience this fine day when you awoke.  
Or, no, that’s right, you fell asleep. You’d left the windows open last night, in hopes the chilly night air might stall your sleepiness for a few more hours as you read by dimming candlelight. It failed, evidently.  
A cloud then passed by, stealing the sun’s glow, casting a cool shadow. But the birds still chirped, and you supposed tea was in order this morning as well, and so you adamantly set to pursue it.

The walk to the kitchen was grand. The cloud soon passed, and though there were no windows in the hall to peak out of, the sun’s warmth heated the castle’s air systems. And, you noticed some of the flowers began to wilt, which might seem to hinder spirits but it meant you got to spend a day picking flowers, and what a lovely task!   
Spending a day picking flowers meant spending a day traveling with Adrien as your guide, as your guardian, and as your companion.   
Adrien, you thought, was a lovely companion. Of course, he wasn’t at first. He’d been cold and condescending of your ways, of your optimism, your lightness. And truly lightness is not something you found adept within Alucard, besides in his appearance of course.   
No, something dark and damp and terribly withered lived within the man, and, though you hadn’t quite peeled off all the layers and dragged out the beast yet, you found that Adrien was quite on his way to lightness. Yes, you could see a bit of lightness in his eyes now, and though what held Adrien’s heart was something wicked and broken, you saw the beginnings of hope and something close enough to lightness. 

“Adrien?” You called hearing his voice coming from the kitchen, “I’m going to do some laundry today, do you have anything- Oh!”  
Two figures, a man and a woman sat in the dining room with Adrien. “Good day,” you nodded curtly.  
Adrien stood quickly, his chair shrieking against the floor, he said your name, smiling as you approached.  
Smiling. A sweet thing, especially when it came from Adrien. It was something so rare when you arrived at Castlevania and yet here he was giving such a precious gift so freely. It made you feel as though you’d walked in on something.  
“Come, meet our new guests,” his voice was monotonous as usual, but there was something kin to excitement within it.   
“I think I’ll make some tea,” you moved past him, “would our guests like Chamomile?”  
“Oh, no thank you,” came the woman.  
“How about mint green? Or this one, which has a bit of a pomegranate flavor- it’s imported,” you continued, not having yet faced said guests.  
Adrien called your name and it sounded like he was approaching.  
“Or, I made this blend myself. I think I’ll have that-” Adrien touched your shoulder, grabbing your attention, silencing your rambling.  
“This is Taka and Sumi. They’re staying with us, so I can teach them.”   
Teach them? Yes, you supposed Adrien would make a fine teacher. He did a wonderful job of criticising you all the time, after all.  
“Come, sit with us,” he repeated, and the pressure of his hand on your shoulder led you back to the dining table.

The sunlight was just as bright in the kitchen as it had been in your bedroom when you woke up. More clouds had spread, but the sky was still blue, the warmth seeped in, and the birds, though muffled, still warbled.  
“That’s awful!” You brought your teacup to your lips, blowing on the steaming contents before continuing, “I’m so glad you found Adrien then.”  
“Yes,” Adrien turned to you, “so I hope you don’t mind looking through the library by yourself today.”  
“We need as much help as we can get-”  
“So we’d like to start as soon as possible.”  
The three spoke so quickly, so passionately.   
“Of course,” Adrien released a sigh of relief, it seemed he had been holding his breath, “but I was hoping we could pick some flowers-”  
“Have we not just picked flowers?”   
“Flowers wilt.”  
“And you need me to pick them with you?”  
“I’d surely get lost-”  
“Take a map-”  
“And if a bear or a night creature-”  
“Alright!” Adrien shot up. His voice brought an air of finality. Silence settled. Your teacup rattled on the saucer when Adrien brought his fist down on the table. You brought the cup to your lips, held it there for just a moment, before setting it back down.  
“I know,” You spoke softly, your gaze set on the ruddy colored liquid in your cup, “I’ll buy some flowers instead, in town.”  
Adrien sighed, your name slipped through his lips as he rubbed his temple, “No, it’s alright, we’ll go tomorrow-”   
“I don’t mind, it’s a few days journey- you’ll have time alone until I return.”  
You weren’t sure when, but the birds had stopped warbling.   
Adrien’s jaw tightened, but he offered a grateful twitch at the lips when you brought your gaze to him.  
Finally, you returned your focus to Taka and Sumi, who had cast their eyes anywhere but the scene which had unfolded before them, “before I make my leave, do you two have any laundry?”

The day had started so promisingly, the sun’s rays beating down as you pulled carrots out of the ground. You sat, dirt staining your knees. You wiped the sweat on your forehead with your arm. It was a summer’s day, truly, and yet you found relaxation in the simplicity of your task.   
Nothing quite compared to the terror and frightful events of last year, all the excitement bringing your community to a state you could never have seen or believed otherwise.   
Just last year, you would have seen your neighbor, a lovely older man with a distinct liveliness in him, lived with his daughter who you frequently had tea with. Well, the old man was bitten straight in half, just like that, two winged night creatures tugged at his lower half until they tore his legs apart, gobbling them in their beaked mouths before taking off with his daughter as well. And not a day later, raiders had come and ransacked their home, leaving quite the mess behind. All this visible from where you sat right now.   
And you might have joined your neighbors in their ill fate, but of course, you had been out of town, visiting your grandmother who had fallen ill- nothing major, just a little cough. But of course, blood had been spattered across your gardenias, and when one’s gardenias are spattered in blood, one often questions the nature of why.   
You set your carrots on a towel to be washed later, wiping your hands with the end of it.   
You glanced over to the small table in your kitchen, a courier had come by earlier that morning, handing you a letter stained with dirt and smelling awful and foul. You accepted it carefully, and when you asked who it came from, you smiled when you heard it was from a speaker.   
Sypha.  
She was a good friend of yours. You used to listen to her stories as children, while your mother received medical treatment from the speakers.   
You unfolded the letter and sat down to read. She spoke of a journey she had taken, with two men whom she spoke quite fondly of, unusually. And while she had continued her journey with one, the other was holed up, terribly alone in a large, frightful castle. ‘Perhaps you could bring him one of your pies or cakes?’ she asked, and requested you keep an eye on her friend for her.   
Well, you weren’t sure how much you could do for a seemingly tortured dhampire soul, one who locked himself in a moving castle which housed painfully raw sweet-turned-sour memories, but you supposed you would try and do your best.   
The castle was only a day or two’s journey, and you could see the peaks of it’s spires if you squinted. It could have been mistaken for a mountain, if perhaps it had been there your whole life. So, you tucked the letter away and began packing, “I better pick a recipe which won’t spoil within the next few days.”

When you stood in front of the large gothic doors, which had swung open after three rounds of knocking, kicking up dust with the cold draft, you had suddenly felt quite ridiculous. Especially under the gaze of the tall, lean figure before you, who seemed to glow and radiate the air of power and might and all the beauty in a summer’s day.   
He didn’t ask a question, yet he demanded an answer with but a raise of his eyebrow, and you suppressed the urge to admire as one does when faced with something of great magnificence.  
You announced your name, bowing your head, then announcing your purpose, offering the note. He took it. His hands were slender and pretty, despite the dirt and calluses and obvious weathering. He was a soldier, after all.   
He held the note and turned it in his hands before dropping it and facing you, “I’m too drunk to read this right now.”  
Oh. You could have sworn Sypha said Trevor was the drunkard. Or perhaps this was Trevor before you, and she was traveling with Alucard.  
The man, whichever he was, leaned down to meet eye level with you, “You said you know Sypha?”

It was difficult to handle him, Alucard, when he was sober. He was much quieter and much less trusting. Conversations were tense and one sided. Many topics were off limits with him, and you, who found hospitality and friendliness such an easy task, were at once at a loss for words.   
You did not wish to dredge up foul memories and so finding a talking point was quite difficult. You couldn’t comment on the decor of the extravagant castle, for its history was too dark and painfully twisted for the poor man. His parents, his childhood, were far from a reasonable discussion, and so by contrasting solidarity, were your parents and childhood.   
He never touched the cake you had brought for him either. You suggested it might go well with the wine, the rich chocolate complimenting the bitter flavors. He turned his gaze and mumbled something about having a taste later. Later melted into the night, and soon you had found a rat had discovered the cake.   
“At least someone enjoyed it,” you meant it jokingly, of course, but you couldn’t lie and say you weren’t at least a little offended. You understood that taking desserts from strangers was not the wisest choice in these mistrusting times, but you had proven your credibility with the letter. And the chocolate was rather difficult to obtain, too. It took nearly an hour of bargaining at the market, and even then did not come cheap. You were a little disappointed such had to go wasted.  
Nonetheless, you supposed the cake was not your main mission, but to keep an eye on the poor man and assist him with a kind heart and honest friendship, so as not to let loneliness consume him. And you would be damned if you didn’t honor that duty.  
And so despite his groaning, his threats, his sour attitude, you stayed. You stayed through his fits, his tantrums, his drunken nights and mornings and middays and you stayed through his tears, too.   
He might send you out of the room, shout at you to leave, threaten to bite your neck and claw your flesh, and yet he knew, without a sliver of doubt in his mind, that even then he could call your name and you would be there in an instant to hold his hand and soothe his withered heart.   
It hadn’t taken that long. A week, perhaps, was all it took before he had gotten used to you.   
That week was slow, agonizingly slow. Painful, too, even for you. But you found yourself caring so deeply for Adrian, it seemed out of the question to do anything but stay.  
And you knew he cared for you too. He wouldn’t admit it, but you saw it.   
He told you which plants were poisonous, even if you already knew, it showed he cared when his head whipped up and he reached for your arm, “Don’t get closer than that. If you touch that it’ll sting you.”  
And he began eating your meals too. At first, you believed it was just because it meant he didn’t have to cook for himself every night, and perhaps that was true at first. But he began tasting your desserts as well. “Can you make more of this?” He asked one night, because a second helping just wasn’t enough.   
He started cooking with you, too. Adrian was a splendid cook, you found. He clearly knew very well what he was doing in the kitchen. You two worked seamlessly together, it was wonderful! You hadn’t cooked with someone else since your childhood, and Adrian certainly reminded you of your mother as he watched your hands closely while you chopped onions. He seemed nonchalant in expression, but when his eyes glanced over they seemed to be anxious and wary.   
Truly, you two had become protective of each other.

You laid Adrian’s shirts neatly across his bed. You wondered if hanging them up for him like you usually did was a bit too much. Perhaps simply laying them on the bed would make a statement, that you were upset. Did you even want Adrian to know you were upset? Truly you had no reason to be, and you were just a bit jealous was all. No reason to get Adrian worked up about it too.   
And yet, there you were, carrying Adrian’s clean shirts back to the drying line for him to pick up himself.   
You didn’t quite know what had gotten into you. You knew Adrian’s training Taka and Sumi was healthy for him, and it would certainly be good for him to have more friends, especially ones that had similar goals and values. Perhaps you were just upset because they had something to share, something hopeful and strong to foster, and you were simply there to pick up Adrian’s broken pieces.

It was getting dark out. You hadn’t seen Adrian or his companions all day. You tried to not let it get the better of you, filling the day with busy work to keep your mind off of it.   
Candlelight filled the kitchen as you worked. It was quiet, like when you lived alone, and you were not fond of it so you hummed. It was catchy. You weren’t sure if you had heard the tune before or if you were just making it up, but it was catchy.   
You soon found it easy to sway your hips to the tune, and you twirled across the kitchen. You picked up a knife, and twirled to the other side of the kitchen to cut the tomato, and twirled to the herb cabinet, and twirled to sprinkle them over the chicken.   
And soon, you twirled until you were dizzy, and nearly tripped over your own feet. But of course, Adrian had come in and was there to catch you before you hit the ground.   
The knife in your hand clanged to the floor.   
“Please be careful,” his tone was monotonous, yet he chuckled, “you almost cut yourself.”   
And you giggled too. Of course Adrian would be there to catch you. You hadn’t lost him, he was just somewhere else. But he was there with you when you needed him.   
“How was the library?” You asked. He helped you up and held your hand as he twirled you carefully. He let go to pick up the knife.   
“Sit down and I’ll finish dinner. It was, well, dreadfully dismal- as is the nature of the Belmont library.” You leaned against the counter to watch as he continued preparing the meal. He talked of his company and you couldn’t feel anything but pride and hope for him as he spoke fondly of the two. You were happy for him. Genuinely.   
He seemed excited about his new task, filled with ambition and passion once more. It was a brilliant look on him, you thought. You smiled, popping in more questions to perpetuate his joyous chatter.  
“And, I want to apologize for my tone earlier. I didn’t mean to push you away,” he looked directly at you now, his hands ceasing, “You don’t have to go if you don’t want to. I’ll take you to-” you cut him off with your own apology. You explained yourself, and Adrian simply replied with a soft, “Oh.”  
He returned to the meal. 

The next morning you began packing for your journey. You had told Alucard you thought it best if he had time alone to work with Taka and Sumi. And surely he needed a break from being stuck up in a castle alone with you, you added with a giggle. He flashed a brief and weak smile.  
He stated again that he was not forcing you to leave, and you reassured him you were going on your own, and most of all that you would return. That seemed to satisfy him as he nodded, offering to help you load your horse.   
The sun was out this day, though not incredibly overbearing. There were no clouds, and a breeze drifted through. You commented on this to Adrian, who offered brief hums at your observations.   
Once your horse was loaded, and you were prepared to mount and leave, you returned your focus to Adrian. His eyes looked tired and you professed your worry for his health, “Please take care of yourself while I’m gone. And don’t give those two a hard time if they offer to help,” you giggled.   
His brows furrowed at the sound. He was going to miss your laugh. Your lightness. You hadn’t specified when you would return, claiming you had a few other errands to run while you were in town. How long would he go without your lightness? Surely any amount of time would be too long.   
You noticed his worry and reached for his hands in yours, “I’m coming back, Adrian-”  
“I know.”  
“And I’ll return before you know it-”  
“I know.”  
You squeezed his hands. He brought yours to his lips to place a kiss on your knuckles. 

“Make me a cake when I return!” You called as your horse parted.   
“Bring me some wine when you return,” he called back.   
“I love you,” you called as you moved farther away.  
You were too far to hear him say it back.  
Too many thoughts clouded your mind upon your return, faced with two pierced bodies. Heads on spikes. Too many feelings clouded your heart.  
All were of Adrian.  
“Adrian?” You called once you made it inside the castle. You were frantic, tears already streaming down your cheeks with worry. Where was he? What happened? You called his name again, practically running up the stairs in search of him.   
Adrian heard you call for him. He thought perhaps he was delusional at first. But then he heard a string of curses and worried sobs and the pounding of heavy footsteps in the halls and he knew you were real.  
He couldn’t move, though. He sat on the floor, head in his hands as his own sobs filled the room. He was sure you were following them. He knew you would find him.

You were gone for too long. You knew you shouldn’t have left and you did. You knew there was something dark festering in Adrian and you left him to deal with it by himself. You had failed your duty and you betrayed Adrian. How could he trust you after this? How could you trust yourself?  
Where the hell was he? Why did this goddamn castle have to be so big? You couldn’t hear anything outside of your blood rushing and your own pants and swears. He wasn’t in his room, neither the study, nor the kitchen. Dammit! You were supposed to be there for him! Why couldn’t you find him?

You stopped breathing, your heart pounded in your ears and your head reeled at the lack of oxygen, but you could hear his sobs, “Adrian!”  
You were on him in an instant, by his side as soon as you caught sight of his shrinking form, huddled and closed off, tucked in on himself atop your bed.  
You spewed apologies. In rapid succession, they poured out of your mouth as his cries grew louder. He flinched when you touched him. He knew it was you but he couldn’t trust touch.   
“It’s alright, Adrian. I’m here with you,” you slowed your voice, attempting to soothe him as he shook. You took him in your arms and he leaned all his weight on you. He squeezed your frame as you brought a hand to run through his hair, the other rubbing circles on his back.  
He spoke, his voice rushed and choked, his sentences choppy as he struggled to get them out between sobs. You couldn’t understand his words entirely, but you picked out what he was trying to say and your heart ached. “your fault… sorry… alone… betrayed… father.”  
You rubbed his back steadily, letting him tire himself out like a mother comforts a child. And eventually, an hour passed and his cries faded. Your shirt was wet from his tears, and his from your own. His breathing evened out and you thought perhaps he fell asleep right on top of you. He sat perfectly still, and you just kept rubbing his back, cooing soft words of comfort in his ear.   
Adrian was awake.

A little while had passed. It was completely dark in the room, your curtains closed to block out the moonlight. You offered to light a candle but he wanted the room dark. He could see just fine anyway.  
You offered to bring him something to eat, since you were sure he hadn’t taken care of himself while you were gone, at least not tonight. He didn’t want you to leave him. He didn’t want to leave the room either. And he wasn’t particularly hungry anyway. You wanted to at least get him some water, but promised yourself you would retrieve it once he fell asleep.  
You laid him down and tucked him in under the covers. You sat in a rocking chair beside the bed, humming softly to give him something soothing to focus on. To remind him that you were there.


End file.
